[Howard]0523 TOFEL(agree or not)

People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment—doing things they like to do- rather than doing things they should do.
現代人花太多時間在做自己喜歡做的事,而不是在完成應盡的義務
–> 題目是在問,你覺得這個說法是對的嗎?

  1. agree: 我看到很多人都花太多時間在做自己喜歡的事,[但他們同時也很認真過生活]
    • 休息是為了走更長遠的路
    • 生活經驗是進步的元素
    • 有些人是興趣結合工作
  2. disagree: 我看到現代人大多忙於工作、學業,而非做自己喜歡的是

People today do spend more time on personal enjoyment than before, but I don’t think this means they spend less time on working or become lazy. [There are three factors to support my idea.]

First, [people needs more rest to release the heavy pressure from work and life]. Rest is for longer journey. It is important to have enough resting time for workers because it is a way to save energy. Also, looking forward to resting time can support a person’s mind when he or she is tired of working. Take me/myself for example, when I feel tired during class time, I always/will say to myself,” It’s almost break time. Hold on for a few more minutes.” Then I can focus on my study a little more. In the break time, I take a rest and make myself well-prepared for the next class. Just like resting can make me learn better, having sufficient rest can always boost one’s working efficiency.

Second, I believe that people do more personal enjoyment because the belief that life experience is an important part for people to improve is getting popular. By doing their personal enjoyment, they can easily get a lot of life experience, which can help them do better job at work. For example, a teacher who likes to travel can learn a lot of foreign culture in his trips, and he can talk to his student about that to  give students better knowledge.  As a result, numbers of people tend to spend time on personal enjoyment because it can lead to better work performance.   (如果結論停留在此,題目應該是「做自己的事的優點」,應該再扣回「現在人因此會多花時間在做有興趣的事」)

Third, there are things that are combinations of work and rest(*unclear). [people are choosing to do things that can both interest them and enhance their ability.] Sometimes, it’s hard to judge if a person is working or resting(playing)(?) because he or she may be doing both at the same time. Take children’s English learning for example, there are education resources for children(換成student可更有學習是義務的聯想) which include games and videos, such as Voicetube, and children can learn by playing the games or watching the videos. By these resources, children can learn and have fun at the same time. The more fun they have, the more they learn. There isn’t a line between resting and working. [舉例和解釋要對應: work 還是 learn?] Under such circumstances, it seems that people spend more time on doing what they like, but they are doing what they take charge of as well. 

In conclusion, I agree that people today spend more time on personal enjoyment, but it doesn’t mean people become lazy or they don’t work as hard as they did before. In fact, their work performance may even be better than before because of the practical experience they have got on doing what pleases them. the time they spend on enjoyment.


看看別人的文章:

Sample Essay

The question of how our leisure time should be spent has been debated for many years. Many people feel that people today spend too much time on personal enjoyment, but I hold the opposite opinion. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.

​First of all, people spend more time working than ever before, which means that broadly speaking, individuals are spending a lot of time doing things that they should be doing. Studies indicate that we spend more time at our offices than ever before, and that smart phones and internet access means that people continue to work even when they are not being paid. My own experience is a compelling example of what I mean. I work for a large investment banking firm where my scheduled workday is from nine o’clock to five o’clock, but I actually average about eight hours of overtime every week. I do not do this because I enjoy it, but because I feel a sense of obligation to provide a service to my company and earn money for my family. Everyone at my firm does the same thing. We often compare ourselves to our parents, who almost never worked overtime nor took weekend calls and e-mails from their bosses. It seems like the present generation emphasizes professional obligations over  personal enjoyment.

​Secondly, it seems to me that many popular leisure activities include a self-improvement aspect, which means that even our hobbies fall into the realm of what we should be doing. One of the most popular past-times these days seems to be long distance running, an activity which is also incredibly beneficial for our health. Another perfect example is the way I spend most of my free time working out at a local gym. Although this is certainly enjoyable for me, part of why I do it is that it keeps me strong, healthy and fit. This makes me both a better family man and a better employee. I consider all of these to be things that I should be deeply concerned about.

​In conclusion, I am of the opinion that people today do not spend an inordinate amount of time doing things that they like to do. This is because people work longer hours than ever before, and because even our personal hobbies tend to involve an aspect of obligation.

source: http://www.toeflresources.com/index.php?id=toefl-essay-do-people-spend-too-much-time-on-personal-enjoyment

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